diff --git a/r2/r2/lib/db/tdb_sql.py b/r2/r2/lib/db/tdb_sql.py
index abf919ff1..29c885784 100644
--- a/r2/r2/lib/db/tdb_sql.py
+++ b/r2/r2/lib/db/tdb_sql.py
@@ -508,6 +508,8 @@ def set_data(table, thing_id, **vals):
         i = table.insert(values = dict(thing_id = thing_id))
         i.execute(*inserts)
 
+    return len(inserts)
+
 def incr_data_prop(table, type_id, thing_id, prop, amount):
     t = table
     transactions.add_engine(t.bind)
diff --git a/r2/r2/lib/db/thing.py b/r2/r2/lib/db/thing.py
index d8b446011..ff74b747e 100644
--- a/r2/r2/lib/db/thing.py
+++ b/r2/r2/lib/db/thing.py
@@ -257,7 +257,11 @@ class DataThing(object):
                     data_props[k] = v
 
             if data_props:
-                self._set_data(self._type_id, self._id, **data_props)
+                useless_updates = self._set_data(self._type_id,
+                                                 self._id,
+                                                 **data_props)
+            else:
+                useless_updates = 0
 
             if thing_props:
                 self._set_props(self._type_id, self._id, **thing_props)
@@ -271,6 +275,18 @@ class DataThing(object):
 
             self._cache_myself()
 
+        thing_or_rel = "thing" if self._type_prefix == "t" else "rel"
+
+        if useless_updates:
+            g.stats.simple_event("%s.useless_updates.%s" % (thing_or_rel,
+                                                            self._type_name),
+                                useless_updates)
+        if data_props:
+            g.stats.simple_event("%s.data_props.%s" % (thing_or_rel,
+                                                       self._type_name),
+                                 len(data_props))
+
+
     @classmethod
     def _load_multi(cls, need):
         need = tup(need)